Archives for July 2020

Seven Years.

“Those who have never known the deep intimacy and the intense companionship of mutual love have missed the best thing that life has to give.” – Bertrand Russell

Every year I dedicate a post to celebrate the anniversary of our marriage. This year it feels a bit different. Around this time we’re usually jet setting, travelling to a new destination to get away from reality, spending time exploring new places together. Even though travel for leisure is basically banned right now due to the pandemic, we wouldn’t have been going anywhere too far anyway because I’m 33 weeks pregnant! I would be lying if I said I’m not sad we’re unable to travel, but I have completely accepted it; Brandon and I are actually embarking on the biggest adventure of our lives! This pregnancy has brought us even closer together, which I honestly didn’t know could have been possible. It may sound cheesy and cliche, but my love and admiration for Brandon has grown, as he has been so incredibly supportive. He may not fully understand what it is like for me to be pregnant and the physical changes I’m going through, but he does his best. Emotionally, I would be an absolute disaster without Brandon by my side. There is one thing I know for certain, and that is Brandon is going to be the best father ever.

Cheers to seven years of marriage, Brandon! My love for you continues to grow and I look forward to sharing our love with our baby girl in September!

Photos: Carrie J Photography

Baby, Fashion

Dressing the Bump.

“Fashion is only the attempt to realize art in living forms and social intercourse.” – Francis Bacon

As someone who is dress obsessed, I’m lucky that my pregnancy fell within the warmer months. This made it much easier to find clothing that both suited my personality and my expanding bump!

During the first trimester, changes to my body came quickly. These changes were most likely not noticeable to anyone else but myself. For example, my boobs got bigger, but not humungous. Bras were the first item of clothing that started to become uncomfortable. In the summer I rarely wear bras, but at this time in my pregnancy it was around February, and for me, bras were needed. I opted for more of a bralette style that was more comfortable to move in, yet still provided support. This one here still remains my favourite. My tummy was changing too, but not into the typical round bump one thinks of. Instead, I felt I was getting a bit of a pouch below my belly button. Anything remotely fitted was off limits. Leggings and tunic tops became my best friends, as well as swing dresses. These felt much more comfortable on my body as they accommodated any changes I was feeling insecure about. Out of caution, I didn’t tell many people I was pregnant during the first trimester, so I didn’t want to dress in a way that I was hiding something, nor did I want to feel awkward in the clothes I already had.

My bump continued to grow, but really “popped” into a hard ball at around 20 weeks, which means I was well into my second trimester. For clothing, my main goal was to find dresses that could fit me throughout the pregnancy, and afterwards as well. I don’t like the idea of spending a lot of money on maternity clothes that would eventually become useless, so I searched the internet for dresses that were maternity friendly rather than actual maternity wear. Since we were (and still are) in a pandemic, I couldn’t go into stores to try clothes on, so I had to pay extra attention to details in order to evaluate if a particular dress would work or not. Here are my tips for finding well suited non maternity dresses:

Babydoll style or empire waist. This is when the skirt of the dress flares out from right under the bust. Thankfully, this is a trend right now. It provides a lot of fabric for your expanding bump.
Avoid zippers and buttons. My chest and waist have obviously expanded, so I avoided anything with zippers or buttons because they would render some dresses useless as I continued to grow. Instead, look for stretchy material and smocking for a more comfortable and longer lasting fit, or even adjustable ties.
Go midi or maxi. Though a mini dress would be cooler during the hot summer days, they don’t work as well if you have a larger bump because the skirt ends up sticking out too far and riding up. Being only 5’1″, midi dresses basically work as maxi dresses for me; they provide just the right amount of coverage. I’ve been fortunate that I can still shave my legs, but for those who have more difficultly, midi and maxi dresses also help with that!
Be aware of lining. Some dresses that worked for me in the second trimester, did not in the third. The main reason was that they had lining that was restrictive and did not fit the bump. If possible, look for dresses without lining to get the maximum amount of use out of them.
Look in your closest. I didn’t have to buy an entirely new wardrobe. Some dresses I wore last summer still fit for pregnancy. My only concern is whether on not I have been stretching them out!
Check out your favourite stores. Most of my dresses were purchased from stores I already shopped at! Here are some of my favourites, especially when finding maternity friendly dresses that fit my criteria: Free People, Urban Outfitters, Zara, American Eagle, Aritzia, Old Navy, Red Dress Boutique.

In terms of sizing, I honestly purchased all my new dresses in my regular, pre pregnancy size. I think this worked because of the tips I mentioned, especially in regards to finding garments that stretch or have smocking. I did buy a couple maternity dresses, but they are actually my least favourite to wear. I think maternity dresses almost make you look more pregnant! That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but I just don’t feel as comfortable in them, and really, comfort is the most important thing. You do what’s best for you. That’s the best advice for anything in regards to pregnancy. What works for one woman, might not for another. Every experience is different. Some feel more confident with the bump than others and wear bodycon/fitted dresses, while others are a little more self conscious. Whatever the case, just know that as a pregnant woman, you are seriously rocking it no matter what!

Dress: Aritzia. Week: 22

Dress: Red Dress Boutique. Week: 23

Dress: Aritzia (sold out, but very similar here). Week: 25

Dress: Tiare Hawaii. Week: 25

Dress: Free People. Week: 26

Dress: Urban Outfitters. Week: 27

Dress: Free People. Week: 28

Dress: Zara. Week: 29

Dress: Free People. Week: 29

Dress: Zara. Week: 30

Dress: Free People. Week: 31

Dress: Purchased pre-pregnancy from Unique Vintage. Week: 32

Baby, Philosophy

On The First Trimester.

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” – Lao Tzu

Thursday January 9. This is the day that would change our lives forever. As soon as I got up in the morning I mustered up the courage to take the test. For a week or so prior, I had a feeling I was pregnant, but didn’t want to admit it to myself. My period was late and my boobs were sore. I was just too scared to face reality. I recall telling my good friend the day before (while we were out in subzero weather striking) and she said, “Vanessa, you need to just take the test.” When I saw the line show up on the test that next morning I cried. I ran into the bedroom and told Brandon right away. He hugged me and told me everything was going to be ok. Going to work that day was rough. A million questions and fears ran through my mind: Am I ready? Will my identity change? Would I be a good mom? Is our house big enough?Will I still be able to enjoy the things I do? These thoughts did not end that day, but continued for pretty much the entire first trimester.

Fortunately, I pretty much had no major symptoms throughout the first trimester and had absolutely no morning sickness. There was more for me to cope with mentally and emotionally, rather than physically. I was in shock, and as I said previously, I was scared. Brandon was, and continues to be, an incredible husband who supported me every step of the way. He understood my anxieties and listened. Time was what was needed in order for me to fully realize that yes, I was going to have a baby.

As soon as I knew I was pregnant, I contacted my family doctor and had all the necessary blood tests. I then had my first ultrasound at 8 weeks. It was at this appointment that the due date of September 6 was given, and I also got to hear the heartbeat for the first time. I still remember seeing that image of a little jellybean and thinking how crazy that life was now growing inside of me. It was right before this ultrasound that we told our family the news. First was my sister, followed by visits to my parents’ house and my mother-in-law’s. Our family was ecstatic and in shock, as not everyone expected me and Brandon to start a family since we have already been together for so long. Honestly, at that point, I was still in a bit of shock myself! I also told a couple of close friends, just so I could have some more emotional support in the early stages of pregnancy.

My next set of blood tests and ultrasound were scheduled for 12 weeks, which would be near the end of the first trimester. The baby wasn’t very cooperative that day and I had to run around, do jumping jacks, and move side to side in order for the technician to get the information required. After she was able to do so, Brandon and I finally got a glimpse of what actually now started looking more like a human than a bean. It was also around this time that I started to feel my body change. Clothes were getting tighter, and while there was no clear baby bump, I felt as if I was getting a bit of a beer gut! My energy levels were still high, and I was able to do the workout routine I had been doing months prior, which included rowing, dumbbell lifting, ab exercises, and jumprope. I stopped powerlifting in late fall, so I felt no need to start back up with it at this time.

More than anything, during the first trimester, I just wanted to tell everyone I was pregnant. I absolutely hate keeping secrets! Brandon and I just wanted to play it safe before we started telling everyone. In addition to that, I found these first few months to go by the quickest. After all, I didn’t even officially know I was expecting until one month in. Also, during this time we planned a ‘babymoon’ in Miami for March Break to officially celebrate (but more about that in an upcoming post on living through a pandemic in my second trimester) and I purchased a new car to prepare for the baby.

As I said, the first trimester was more difficult for me emotionally, than physically. There were days where lots of tears were shed and fear was all that was on my mind. But there were also days of wonder and curiosity, of self growth and understanding. When I told my colleagues at school I was pregnant, I never expected such joyous reactions. Announcing on social media also had the same effect, where I was taken aback by the genuine well wishes that were sent our way. It was as if I needed the positive reassurance of others that this was in fact, going to be the best adventure Brandon and I could ever embark on.

We’re in this together 🙂

Archives for July 2020

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